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Wednesday, November 13, 2013

“Please Don’t Tell Me What I’m Doing Wrong” by Another Mom Suffering Parental Alienation --not my words but so perfectly expressed

“Please Don’t Tell Me What I’m Doing Wrong” by Another Mom Suffering Parental Alienation

(Posted on Facebook by Asha Bas, Who Granted Permission to Share her poem in Hopes That “Others Will Know They Are Not Alone”)

I’m in a living nightmare
Something deeply precious was stolen
I’m in ongoing grief and despair
Unbidden tears awash again and again
Never any idea what to do, or what to say
Everything is used against me, the rules are unfair
Forlorn, how to get out I see no way
domestic terrorism

But I have to stay strong and I have to beware
It would be easier to give up, to let go
Easier to close down completely
But the future I cannot know
Behind closed doors I do not see
So I fight against the abuse and lies
Ever continue to stand up for what is right
My grief I cannot continuously disguise
Sometimes my words come out with a bite
But my words come out, which can be quite hard
Though I’m afraid, I can move and walk around
I’m not an actor, a social person, or a bard
Sometimes my mouth has opened with no sound
Please don’t tell me what I’m doing wrong
I already know and I berate myself enough as it is
My treasures were stolen and I do not belong
My family torn asunder with a crushing deadly kiss
I cannot concern myself with little people in this game
Who may or may not be playing behind the scenes
Aloof and careful, I must treat everyone as the same
To the abuser, it is clear that the end justifies the means
I do not know who to trust and my choices are few
I have limitted knowledge and little experience
I’m more likely to trust, to see the good in you
I have learnt that I perhaps should not take that chance
If I let my guard down I may lose even more
Years, time, freedom that may never be recalled
The hurtful slander that sticks I abhor
With their increasing power I am appalled
It crushes the spirits and wearies the very soul
The years and lies drag on with no end in sight
With my heart ripped out, I am not whole
So be thankful I can speak, even if i do bite
And remember that a dog bites because it is afraid
Afraid of the unknown, and often of what they have learned
With no choices and no idea, I go where I am bade
Hindsight has taught me, with trust I have been burned
Please don’t tell me what I’m doing wrong
Be impressed, instead, that against the odds I’m still here!
I’m staying in this nightmare and hanging on
Despite the impossible odds and the unending fear!

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