*Move out of state if the judge allows
*Homeschool the children to avoid the possibility that X may become a 'community volunteer' in your child's classroom-thus biasing the teacher against you. Especially when you forget the parent/teacher conference or send Godiva into school on gym day in a sari and high heels
*Live off the grid. No phone, no internet. Makes it harder for kids to be poisoned against you & and they can't call X every time you skip out to the bar.
*Work outside the home but never let it interfere with the kids' activities... basically work from 9 PM to 6 AM so you will be home to get them ready for their day of education and activities. __NO sleep for you.
*Do not celebrate your hard won custody. The wolf is lurking at your door. One mistake and the babies are gone.
*Put your foot down. Don't try to get your kids to like you. I made this mistake - giving in to their demands. They still hate me and I never get any respect nor any help around the house.
*If your state allows it, continue to punish them in a physical way. ... if not take I-pods, laptops, cell phones. I hide the kids' electronics in my locked car, in my underwear drawer, in the dishwasher-(it's broken)
*Stop wasting your time printing out chore charts-
*Duct tape is quite often your best choice
*Encourage them to pursue higher education and guarantee that X will pay for it.
*Make them pay their way as soon as possible. -- this does work.. I have 3 grown kids that are fully self supporting. YAYA cuz soon I'll be living with them
*Don't get mad (don't let the kids or X see you get mad) JUST get even. (legally)